May be you will be agreed that the root of much unhappiness is comparison. Comparison gets in the way of healthy self-appreciation â€” and thus happiness â€“ more than anything else. Because of comparison, hardly anybody is ever happy with what they get and nothingâ€™s ever good enough for practically everybody. Thatâ€™s because we measure our success in anything by comparing it to what others have or to what we have had before.
In other words, whether you are happy with what you get depends on how it measures up to some norm. That norm depends on two things: what other people get (social comparison), and what you yourself are used to getting (habituation). It is hard for success in any form (money, status, prestige, and so on) to improve your happiness because as actual success rises, the norm by which success is judged rises in step.
A study, for instance, found Olympic bronze medalists to be happier than silver medalists. The bronze medalists, it turns out, tended to compare themselves with all the people who competed but won no medal at all, while the silver medalists compared themselves with the gold medal winners and tortured themselves with the belief that they could have â€“ should have â€“ won the gold. Similarly, in families, it has been found that the more your spouse earns, the less satisfied you are with your own job.
Because we constantly compare ourselves to others, we donâ€™t feel good about what we have and who we are. The grass seems greener in neighborâ€™s lawn. Continuing with this metaphor, it might be said that the grass always seems to be greener in neighborâ€™s yard because (1) weâ€™re urinating on our own lawn and (2) looking at neighborâ€™s lawn from our lawn, and everything looks better from a distance. There is only one solution to this â€œgrass is greenerâ€ problem: practicing self-appreciation. Self-appreciation involves both staying off of other peopleâ€™s lawns and taking care of your own.
Letâ€™s try to be happy with your selection!
Dear friend Ashiq
I respect your opinion. As you are peaceful student, so authority should respect our demand and solve all of our demand.
I hope university will provide us all of facilities like EWU, NSU, BU.