Career Development Centre (CDC) > Career Jokes

Office Jokes

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jafar_bre:
like vamp air .........

ashiqbest012:
hahahah... nice answer Limon. Good....Anyway, 

Comment:M.P sir

Means: Mindblowing Post sir

Shamim Ansary:
Top job interview questions and answers for manager:

The following short quiz consists of 4 questions and will tell you whether you are qualified to be a professional manager. Scroll down for each answer. The questions are NOT difficult. But don't scroll down UNTIL you have answered the question!

1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?
The correct answer is: Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, and close the door. This question tests whether you tend to do simple things in an overly complicated way.

2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?
Did you say, Open the refrigerator, put in the elephant, and close the refrigerator?
Wrong Answer.
Correct Answer: Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door. This tests your ability to think through the repercussions of your previous actions.

3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend... except one. Which animal does not attend?
Correct Answer: The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator. You just put him in there. This tests your memory. Okay, even if you did not answer the first three questions correctly, you still have one more chance to show your true abilities.

4. There is a river you must cross but it is used by crocodiles, and you do not have a boat. How do you manage it?
Correct Answer: You jump into the river and swim across. Have you not been paying attention? All the crocodiles are attending the Animal Meeting. This tests whether you learn quickly from your mistakes.

Shamim Ansary:
How reports get written

Original reply: Mice have four feet.
Management comment: Elaborate!
Revision 1: Mice have five appendages, and four of them are feet.
Comment: No discussion of fifth appendage!
Revision 2: ...

Shamim Ansary:
Recommendation Letter

While working with Mr. Nasim, I have always found him

working studiously and sincerely at his table without idling or

gossiping with colleagues in the office. He seldom

wastes his time on useless things. Given a job, he always

finishes the given assignment in time. He will always be

deeply engrossed in his official work, and can never be

found chit-chatting in the cafeteria. He has absolutely no

vanity in spite of his high accomplishment and profound

knowledge of his field. I think he can easily be

classed as outstanding, and should on no account be

dispensed with. I strongly feel that Mr. Nasim should be

pushed to accept promotion, and a proposal to administration be

sent as soon as possible. Sd/-

Branch Manager

PS: MR. NASIM WAS PRESENT WHEN I WAS WRITING THIS REPORT EARLIER TODAY.
KINDLY READ ONLY THE ALTERNATE (BLACK) LINES 1,3,5... FOR MY TRUE ASSESSMENT OF HIM.

REGARDS

Sd/-
Branch Manager

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