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Be a Leader / 7 Effective Leadership Skills to Manage Your Time
« on: June 06, 2017, 02:08:24 PM »
Do you always manage your time and properly hit your targets, goals, and deadlines? Effective leadership skills are gleaned through various practices, including learning how to manage your time.


As simple as it sounds, the first thing you need to do is start. If you have something you need to write, sit down and write the first paragraph.

Set Clear Goals and Objectives.

Keep a to-do list, in combination with a day planner if you like. Be sure to go into each day with a clear idea of what you need to do

Know Your “Sweet Spot” of the Day.

What is your most productive period of time? What is your least productive time? Did you achieve your goals? How could you have done what you were doing more effectively?

Handle e-mail and Phone Calls in Batches.

If you are like most people, you get phone calls and e-mail messages throughout the day. Try chunking e-mail and telephone calls together and return them all at once.

Divide Larger Tasks into Groups of Smaller Ones.

Break a job into bite-sized pieces for easier consumption. Look at it like cleaning a room. You should pick a task to match the amount of time available.

Prioritize Tasks.

Try to understand the difference between urgent and important. Also try to create lists of what must be done , what should be done and what you would like done by the end of the day.

Learn When to Say No.

Many people are afraid to let their managers know how busy they are, however, if you are overextended, it is important that you speak up for yourself.

Be a Leader / 7 Effective Leadership Skills to Manage Your Time
« on: June 04, 2017, 02:26:12 PM »
Do you always manage your time and properly hit your targets, goals, and deadlines? Effective leadership skills are gleaned through various practices, including learning how to manage your time.


As simple as it sounds, the first thing you need to do is start. If you have something you need to write, sit down and write the first paragraph.

Set Clear Goals and Objectives.

Keep a to-do list, in combination with a day planner if you like. Be sure to go into each day with a clear idea of what you need to do

Know Your “Sweet Spot” of the Day.

What is your most productive period of time? What is your least productive time? Did you achieve your goals? How could you have done what you were doing more effectively?

Handle e-mail and Phone Calls in Batches.

If you are like most people, you get phone calls and e-mail messages throughout the day. Try chunking e-mail and telephone calls together and return them all at once.

Divide Larger Tasks into Groups of Smaller Ones.

Break a job into bite-sized pieces for easier consumption. Look at it like cleaning a room. You should pick a task to match the amount of time available.

Prioritize Tasks.

Try to understand the difference between urgent and important. Also try to create lists of what must be done , what should be done and what you would like done by the end of the day.

Learn When to Say No.

Many people are afraid to let their managers know how busy they are, however, if you are overextended, it is important that you speak up for yourself.

Be a Leader / 7 Tips for Becoming A Leader At Work
« on: June 04, 2017, 12:50:13 PM »
If you want to become a leader at work, incorporate these actions into your daily routine:

1. Take Responsibility
You want to be a leader at work, learn to take responsibility for anything that has your fingerprint on it. That means, as long as you participate in the project, you have a hand at the failure of the project. Learn to take responsibility for not just the good things, but even bad ones. Admit to your mistakes – it’s okay to be wrong. You cannot learn if you have not made any mistakes.

2. Believe In Win-Win
A rising tide lifts all boats – always think win-win. It exists. Just because the world thinks the business world is nasty, and that you need to be manipulative and maneuvering to win, you need not participate in it.
In fact, make it your contribution not to be nasty and bullying in your ways. You want to be a leader at work, believe in your hands as leader to change the world.
The power of positive influence you have on the people around you and the power to inspire people to greater heights is in front of you.

3. Push The Envelope
Try new things. Take some risk. Make yourself uncomfortable. Do the things that may risk making you look foolish – what do you have to lose? Leaders take risks. They are not afraid of doing what they believe.
What do you believe in that you are willing to take some risk? To be a leader at work, you need to take even simple risks like taking on the project no one wants.

4. Do It, Write It
I have often said this. This world is full of people who talk too much and don’t do enough. If you want to be a leader at work, act upon something. Work that plan. If you have any ideas that are simmering in your mind, write it down. It doesn’t matter if it’s not a plan yet, just write it down. If you don’t write it down, there is no one to present to and there is no record of the idea. How can it count? If you want to be a leader at work, you have practice writing down everything.

5. See Opportunities Everywhere
There is no need to create opportunities for yourself to lead. The opportunities to lead are everywhere. You need to be mindful of these opportunities.
I have just mentioned one earlier. Are there any opportunities to take on the project no one wants? If you don’t see opportunities everywhere, you are missing the point.

6. Be Open
Be open to criticism, otherwise you are just living off yourself. What does it mean? When you are open to feedback, you are being fed ideas from others that are free. Often times, these ideas come from people smarter than you. They will give you tips on how to improve and how to be better.
That’s what a leader needs – constant feedback. You need feedback to be a leader at work, otherwise you are “feed-own” (I just created that word to mean feeding yourself) and you will go hungry soon. With no new ideas, a leader dries up.

7. Give, Give, Give
That’s how you open up. Pour out all you got from inside you. Give all you have ideas, thoughts, plans. Feel the vulnerability and learn to like it. When you pour all your ideas out you will need new ones. Where do new ideas come from? From critics who want to tear you down, from well-meaning supporters and from people you least expect.

These are the seven actions to position yourself as a leader at work. You want to be a leader at work? Do not be afraid of taking risks. You have more to gain than lose when you open up.

Be a Leader / Top 7 Tips on How to Give Your Best and Get the Best
« on: June 02, 2017, 02:48:47 AM »
Has it ever occurred to you that you may not be living up to your potential because you are not giving your best to others including your employer, clients or family and friends?

The reason why most of us live below our capability is because we haven’t learned from a farmer who gave the best of his seeds to his neighbors. He was also known to share his better bred bulls during breeding seasons. This farmer’s way of life shocked one of his friends who asked, "Why do you give your best seeds to your neighbors and even let them use your proven breeding bulls to breed their cows. Don’t you know these people are your competitors?"

The farmer thought for a moment, then responded: "They are not competitors. Yes, we sell our garden produce and diary products at the same market, but that is not the whole picture. You see, when I give my best seeds to them, I am sure my crops will be cross-pollinated with the best. When I share my best bulls, I know there will always be the best within my village."

The success of the top performers in any chosen field can largely be attributed to the unrestrained sharing of their wisdom, time and resources. They pointed open doors for others to enter through the gates of opportunities. They have let would-be competitors learn what it takes to stay ahead from them. Masters of a craft have no worry in showing others "the ropes."

Here are Top 7 Tips on How to Give Your Best and Get the Best:

1. Be in-charge of your own attitude, decisions and actions.

2. Surround yourself with those who challenge and/or encourage your efforts.

3. Learn to see how what you do benefits others instead of focusing on what’s there for yourself.

4. Make efforts to better your skills and improve your quality of life constantly.

5. Let past disappointments be the platform on which you stand to overcome present and future challenges.

6. Give with the right motive.

7. Make giving a lifelong, not a seasonal endeavor.


Fresh Graduate / Application Letter Sample for Fresh Graduates
« on: May 26, 2017, 08:24:29 PM »
This application letter sample shows the correct format you should use when sending out your application letter in print form. If you plan on submitting your application letter via email, refer to the second application letter sample below.

April 17, 2015

Mr. K M Hasan Ripon
House#11, Road#14 (NEW), Dhanmondi, Dhaka

Dear Sir 8),

I am writing to express my interest for the position of Recruitment Assistant in your esteemed company.

Having recently obtained my Bachelor’s Degree in Business Administration major in Human Resource Management in the Daffodil International University (DIU), I wish to bring my knowledge, skills and commitment to excellence to your company’s innovative environment.

As a Business Administration student, majoring in HR management, I’ve become equipped with the necessary knowledge that come with the position including manpower recruitment, workforce organization, personnel training and compensation as well as legal provisions and other labor concerns.

My internship at Daffodil Computers Limited also afforded me with the crucial skills to work with some of the best professionals in the recruitment and human resources industry. Being a trainee has developed in me enthusiasm and a true passion for human resources and has subsequently convinced me that human resource management is my true calling.

For additional details regarding my qualification and expertise, please review my attached resume.

Thank you for taking the time to consider this application and I look forward to hearing from you.



Amena Hasan

Fresh Graduate / The Skills Hiring Managers Found Lacking
« on: May 26, 2017, 08:00:55 PM »
Overall, hiring managers found soft skills such as communication, leadership, ownership, and teamwork were missing in this new crop of workers. The following chart shows the percentage of hiring managers who reported the lack of specific skills.

“Graduates need strong communication and problem-solving skills if they want to interview well and succeed in the workplace, because effective writing, speaking, and critical thinking enables you to accomplish business goals and get ahead,” Dan Schawbel, research director at Future Workplace, said in a statement. “No working day will be complete without writing an email or tackling a new challenge, so the sooner you develop these skills, the more employable you will become,” Schawbel adds.

Be a Leader / 10 Habits for Successful Professionals and Entrepreneurs
« on: December 03, 2013, 03:04:58 PM »
To achieve and sustain success, there are some simple and easy actions that all successful people follow every day. Success, like anything else is a habit and here are the 10 daily habits to get and keep success will knock the door.

1. Think Your Way to Success.
2. Avoid Overly Negative People.
3. Feed Forward to Success.
4. Never Deflect Responsibility.
5. Eliminate "Waiting for perfect time".
6. Speak with Confidence.
7. Post and Read Your Goals.
8. Be Adaptable.
9. Recover from Mistakes Quickly.
10. Be Aggressive When Needed, Humble when Required, Driven Always.

Visit the link:

For more to know please contact with

Mr. K M Hasan Ripon, Director
Bangladesh Skill Development Institute
Email: | Web:

Career Advice / 10 Basic steps of Effective Negotiation Skills
« on: June 19, 2013, 08:56:52 PM »
1. Decide on your starting position and your "bottom line," or lowest point you will accept in the deal.

2. Consider the objectives and emotional motivation of the other party.

3. Plan your sequence of proposals and possible counter-proposals. Open at the most you can reasonably ask for as this gives you room to negotiate.

4. Prepare for the meeting by determining your own motives and objectives: Why are you negotiating? What do you expect to gain and why is it important to you? What do you think you will have to offer to achieve this?

5. Be prepared with information, facts, comparable prices or costs, etc. Avoid going into any negotiation and coming across as either uninformed or unreasonably aggressive.

6. If the other party makes the first offer or proposal, this can allow you to gauge your response and set the parameters of the negotiation to your advantage. Though some experts suggest that your proposal be the first one on the table, this tactic can allow the other party to open at a point that is more favorable to you than you may have anticipated.

7. Start by discussing a mutually agreed upon point of the negotiation — something both parties will readily say yes to.

8. When do propose a deal or an offer phrase as "I will do such-and-such for you, and you will do this for me." This establishes a position of confidence and authority.

9. Make your arguments and proposals incrementally and strategically. Avoid going immediately to your lowest point of acceptance, or bottom-line.

10. Know when it is time to close or break off discussion. If the other party is ready to close the deal, and it is acceptable to you, make it easy for them to do as little as possible by having everything ready to sign, etc.

Career Advice / 8 Steps to Squash a Customer's Complaint
« on: June 19, 2013, 08:54:21 PM »
1.  Listen
Whenever you set out to handle a customer complaint the first thing that you must do is listen. Listen to the customer to figure out why they are upset. Listen to the customer to determine whether any of your policies were not abided by or if this is something outside or not contemplated by your systems. Listen to what they want from you to resolve the issue. A refund? A replacement? Someone else to replace their current service representative at your company?

All too often we are defensive when dealing with customer complaints. Being defensive, at least at the onset, can inhibit your ability to truly understand why the customer is not satisfied with your products. They will tell you the problem, how they think it should be resolved, and give you a critical window into their thinking on the matter. So before you say anything, before you attempt to explain anything, challenge their complaint, or offer a resolution to the situation, listen. 

2. Understand
Next, put yourself in the shoes of the customer. Given what you now know try and see their point of view. Why did they come to you? Is there merit to their complaint? Is their proposed resolution reasonable given the issue? Until you view the issue from their perspective you cannot have a complete picture of the reason for the complaint. So always think, if I was in their shoes how would I feel?

3. Elevate
Once you have heard the complaint and understand the basis for the same, elevate the customer to a supervisor or manager where possible. If the issue is with the front-line employee this will instantly remove some if not all of the customer’s acrimony towards their current representative at the company allowing them to have a more open conversation with someone else. Often this move alone is sufficient to alleviate some of the customer’s concerns by instilling in them a sense of importance, that their complaint is significant enough to be elevated to someone higher in the chain of command.

One note of caution, when elevating be careful to fully inform the person the issue is being elevated to of the relevant facts prior to having them speak with the customer. If this is not done the new representative will be in a position which they must ask the customer to repeat what happened. While most customers, as part of the venting process, will gladly share their story again with the supervisor they should not be made to feel that they must do so for the process to continue to run its course.

4. No Fighting
Defend if you must. But do not fight with the customer. What is the difference you may ask? Often times it comes down to tone and respect. Recall, whether correct or not your customer believes that they are correct. As such, they may be 100% wrong but fighting about the issue will only exacerbate their complaint.

Your job in handling the matter is to listen, understand, and then discuss with the customer their concerns in a calm and friendly manner while conducting an open discussion regarding the issues complained of and how they will be responded to. Fighting with the customer will never resolve the issue and will only lead to heightened aggression and anger on their part. As such, calmly defend your policies or personnel if you must but do not permit the conversation to erode into a argument at any point.

5. Resolution
Offer a resolution where possible. Once you have listened and understood the customer’s complaint and have avoided fighting over the same divert the customer’s focus to how you intend to resolve the matter. Here it is difficult to include all manners of resolution which can be offered given the nature and scope of the goods and services which could be offered, but some suggestions include offering a refund or partial refund of monies paid, if warranted. Discounts on future goods or services is another popular remedy. If the issue is personnel specific simply offering to change out their representative with another will often suffice.

The psychology of the offering of a resolution cannot be understated. Recall, the goal is to resolve the customer dispute with the customer being fully satisfied with your goods or services. Even if the customer’s complaint is unwarranted listening, understanding, elevating, and offering some form of resolution allows the customer to feel that they have won, that they were correct, and that your organization wants to make it right. For most, this will resolve the issue and they will be satisfied. Unfortunately, however, there will always be those select few that you cannot please no matter what you offer. For those, you must incorporate resolve.

6. Resolve
In every customer service situation you will ultimately come to a point of what you can and cannot do to address the issue. Most situations will be able to be addressed and the customer issue resolved to their satisfaction. Unfortunately, from time-to-time, there will be issues which simply cannot be resolved. Whether it is because the customer is requesting something that is outside of your stated policies on such matters or are simply being unreasonable in their requests. For these customers you must understand that despite your best reasonable efforts to offer a reasonable resolution they are unwilling to join you in reality and, accordingly, although our aim is always to please the customer if that which the customer demands cannot be satisfied you must maintain your best offered solution and no more.

7. Writing
Ultimately, when all is said and done and a resolution has or has not been reached always take the time to memorialize the same in writing. If, as in most cases, the matter is resolved to the customer’s satisfaction, you will want to send the customer a brief follow-up email confirming that the issue has now been resolved and the specific resolution involved. In those unfortunate times when a solution cannot be reached, you want to send an email clearly memorializing what transpired such that should the issue ever come back you can quickly review the email and be versed in the same as needed.

8. Learn
Above all, use customer complaints as a manner to learn about potential flaws in your systems. Maintain a manner of tracking customer complaints and the resolution thereof such that, over time, trends or specific issues may be identified to the point that if you see one or more specific situations occurring with any frequency systems can be amended or put into place to address the same in the future before they become future complaints.

Career Advice / 3 Keys to Being a Good Boss
« on: June 19, 2013, 08:50:38 PM »
Presence – You not only “manage by walking around,” you show up to meetings on time to signal that you value the work your employees are doing. When you’re meeting with an employee, you shut off or totally ignore your email, IM, texts and any other interruptions to give your full attention to the employee. If employees need your support to push a key decision forward, you lend your visible presence and direct support.
Praise – You make it a point to give your employees the frequent, timely and specific feedback they need to stay on track and move their projects forward appropriately. You recognize and appreciate them and their efforts that are especially in line with the company’s core values and strategic objectives. Because you are diligent about “catching employees doing something good,” you also help employees receive constructive feedback more readily as they know the feedback is intended to help them advance.
Promise – You help your employees see the future they have with the organization and in their career. You don’t make undue or unwarranted promises of course, but you are committed to helping your team members grow and develop – and they know it. You seek out training and development opportunities for them and encourage them to go. You give them realistic “stretch” goals to help them develop skills.

Career Advice / 6 Ways to Develop Interpersonal Skills
« on: June 19, 2013, 08:47:52 PM »
Identify interpersonal skills in need of development. Looking back on your life, there may have been times when a conflict led to a relationship breakup or a miscommunication led to the loss of an opportunity. Identifying these experiences assists in pinpointing interpersonal goals. You may decide to become a better listener, or practice expressing your feelings more clearly and truthfully.

Focus on building harmonious relationships. If your personal relationships are short-lived or work relationships are cold and distant, concentrate on the qualities necessary for healthy relationships.

    Practice empathy. Putting yourself in the position of another person allows you to see things from a different perspective. When people feel understood, they tend to be less combative, leading to greater understanding and unity.
    Be inclusive. At home, work, community gatherings or social events, practice helping people to feel included. Avoid behaviors that exclude others or make them feel like outsiders.
    Practice fairness. If you tend to take more than you give in relationships, try to be more generous. As an example, if a friend or partner is always accompanying you to events that you enjoy, reciprocate by doing the same for them.
    Be trustworthy. Relationships are more stable when 2 people trust each another. Keep commitments and confidences to increase trust.

Communicate clearly and carefully. Strong communication skills involve listening closely and expressing yourself clearly in person, over the phone and in written communications.

    Listen carefully. Many conflicts arise from misunderstandings. Listening to others helps to clear up miscommunications. As people are talking, focus on their words, tone of voice and body language to glean the true message.
    Speak clearly. In some cases, such as a business meeting, it may be necessary to speak concisely and get right to the point. In a conversation with a family member, communicating effectively may involve elaborating on feelings and providing examples. Each situation is different, but the ultimate goal is to use language that is clear, respectful and effective for getting your message across.
    Practice good judgment in written communications. Humor doesn't always come across clearly in written communications and can sometimes lead to misunderstandings or hurt feelings. Additionally, without a tone of voice or a greater context, words in written communications can seem cold, particularly in regards to sensitive issues. Consider speaking in person about critical issues.

Examine personal ethics. People tend to trust those who are self-aware and who do not abuse their power. Practice integrity in your relationships by examining the impact of your behaviors and decisions on others.

Be a team player. When working with others, engage in a give and take that involves collaboration and compromise. Examine tendencies to dominate situations or criticize others. Praise others for work well done and be open to receiving praise.

Resolve conflicts. Conflict is a natural and inevitable part of life. Diversity of opinion, perspectives and ideas can be enriching. When opinions clash, try to understand people's viewpoints and avoid black and white thinking. In most cases, resolving conflicts involves an honest and respectful expression of feelings. In some cases, it may be necessary to let go of attachments to unimportant issues.

6 Tips to Improve Your Self-Esteem
By John M. Grohol, Psy.D.

1. Take a Self-Esteem Inventory.

You can’t fix what you don’t know. This is one of the core components of cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT). Before you get to work on putting CBT to work, you have to spend a fair amount of time identifying irrational thoughts and what-not.

The same is true for your self-esteem. To simply generalize and say, “I suck. I’m a bad person. I can’t do anything.” is to tell yourself a simple but often convincing lie. I’m here to tell you that it’s not true. We all suck from time to time. The solution isn’t to wallow in suck-age as the core of your identity, but to acknowledge it and move on.

Get a piece of paper. Draw a line down the middle of it. On the right-hand side, write: “Strengths” and on the left-hand side, write: “Weaknesses.” List 10 of each. Yes, 10. That may seem like a lot of the Strengths side if you suffer from poor self-esteem, but force yourself to find all 10.

If you’re having difficulty coming up with a whole 10, think about what others have said to you over the years. “Thanks for listening to me the other night when all I did was talk your ear off!” “You did a great job at work with that project, thanks for pitching in.” “I’ve never seen someone who enjoyed housework as much as you do.” “You seem to have a real knack for telling a story.” Even if you think the Strength is stupid or too small to list, list it anyway. You may be surprised at how easy it is to come up with all 10 when you approach it from this perspective.

This is your Self-Esteem Inventory. It lets you know all the things you already tell yourself about how much you suck, as well as showing you that there are just as many things you don’t suck at. Some of the weaknesses you may also be able to change, if only you worked at them, one at a time, over the course of a month or even a year. Remember, nobody changes things overnight, so don’t set an unrealistic expectation that you can change anything in just a week’s time.

2. Set Realistic Expectations.

Nothing can kill our self-esteem more than setting unrealistic expectations. I remember when I was in my 20s, I had thought, “I need to be a millionaire by the time I’m 30 or I’m going to be a failure.” (Don’t even get me started about how many things are wrong with that statement.) Needless to say, 30 came and I was nowhere close to being a millionaire. I was more in debt than ever, and owning a home was still a distant dream. My expectation was unrealistic, and my self-esteem took a blow when I turned 30 and saw how far away such a goal was.

Sometimes our expectations are so much smaller, but still unrealistic. For instance, “I wish my mom (or dad) would stop criticizing me.” Guess what? They never will! But that’s no reason to let their criticism affect your own view of yourself, or your own self-worth. Check your expectations if they keep disappointing you. Your self-esteem will thank you.

This may also help you to stop the cycle of negative thinking about yourself that reinforce our negative self-esteem. When we make set realistic expectations in our life, we can stop berating ourselves for not meeting some idealistic goal.

3. Set Aside Perfection and Grab a Hold of Accomplishments… and Mistakes.

Perfection is simply unattainable for any of us. Let it go. You’re never going to be perfect. You’re never going to have the perfect body, the perfect life, the perfect relationship, the perfect children, or the perfect home. We revel in the idea of perfection, because we see so much of it in the media. But that is simply an artificial creation of society. It doesn’t exist.

Instead, grab a hold of your accomplishments as you achieve them. Acknowledge them to yourself for their actual value (don’t de-value them by saying, “Oh, that? That’s just so easy for me, no big deal.”). It may even help to keep a little journal or list of things you accomplish. Some people might even do this on a day-by-day basis, while others might feel more comfortable just noting them once a week or even once a month. The key is to get to your smaller goals and move on from each one, like a connect-the-dots game of life.

It’s just as important to take something away from the mistakes you make in life. It doesn’t mean you’re a bad person, it simply means you made a mistake (like everyone does). Mistakes are an opportunity for learning and for growth, if only we push ourselves out of the self-pity or negative self-talk we wallow in after one, and try and see it from someone else’s eyes.

4. Explore Yourself.

“Know thyself” is an old saying passed down through the ages, to encourage us to engage in self-exploration. Usually the most well-adjusted and happiest people I meet are people who have gone through this exercise. It isn’t just about knowing your strengths and weaknesses, but also opening yourself up to new opportunities, new thoughts, trying out something new, new viewpoints, and new friendships.

Sometimes when we’re down on ourselves and our self-esteem has taken a big hit, we feel like we have nothing to offer the world or others. It may be that we simply haven’t found everything that we do have to offer — things we haven’t even considered or thought of yet. Learning what these are is simply a matter of trial and error. It’s how people become the people they’ve always wanted to become, by taking risks and trying things they wouldn’t ordinarily do.

5. Be Willing to Adjust Your Own Self-Image.

Self-esteem is useless if it’s based upon an older version of you that no longer exists. I used to be good at many things I’m no longer good at. I excelled in math while in high school, but couldn’t do a calculus problem today to save my life. I used to think I was pretty smart, until I learned just how little I knew. I could play trombone pretty well at one point, but no longer.

But all of that’s okay. I’ve adjusted my own beliefs about my self and my strengths as I go along. I’ve become a better writer, and learned more about business than I ever knew before. I don’t sit around and say, “Geez, I really wish I could play trombone like I used to!” (And if I cared enough to really think that, I would go and take some lessons to get good at it again.) Instead, I evaluate myself based upon what’s going on in my life right now, not some distant past version of me.

Keep adjusting your self-image and self-esteem to match your current abilities and skills, not those of your past.

6. Stop Comparing Yourself to Others.

Nothing can hurt our self-esteem more than unfair comparisons. Joe has 3,000 Facebook friends while I only have 300. Mary can outrun me on the field when we play ball. Elizabeth has a bigger house and a nice car than I do. You can see how this might impact our feelings about ourselves, the more we do this sort of thing.

I know it’s tough, but you need to stop comparing yourself to others. The only person you should be competing against is yourself. These comparisons are unfair because you don’t know as much as you think you do about these other people’s lives, or what it’s really like to be them. You think it’s better, but it may be 100 times worse than you can imagine. (For instance, Joe paid for that many friends; Mary’s parents have had her in sports training since she was 3; and Elizabeth is in a loveless marriage that only appears to be ideal.)

Recognize your insecurities. What does that voice in the back of your mind say? What makes you uncomfortable or ashamed of yourself? This could be anything from acne, to regrets, friends at school or a past traumatic or negative experience. Whatever is making you feel unworthy, ashamed, or inferior, identify it, give it a name, and write it down. You can also tear these written pieces to start feeling positive on those points.

Talk about it with friends and loved ones. Wear it on your sleeve. Each day you should chip away at it; wear it down. There's no quick fix. Get to the root of the problem; focus on it and understand that you need to resolve each issue before you can move on. Check if it's an old past emotion and if it is really still relevant or applicable in your life today. And that doesn't mean you have to get rid of whatever makes you feel bad (many times, you simply can't). You need to learn to accept yourself, your past, your circumstances as they are, without necessarily thinking of them as "bad".

Bounce back from your mistakes. Remember that no one is perfect. Even the most confident people have insecurities. At some point in any of our lives, we may feel we lack something. That is reality. Learn that life is full of bumps down the road. And that often these insecure feelings come and go, depending on where we are, who we are with, the mood we're in, how we are feeling. In other words, they are not constant.

Identify your successes. Everyone is good at something, so discover the things at which you excel, then focus on your talents. Give yourself permission to take pride in them. Give yourself credit for your successes. Inferiority is a state of mind in which you've declared yourself a victim. Do not allow yourself to be victimized. Express yourself, whether it's through art, music, writing, etc. Find something you enjoy. Everyone is born with talents and strengths. You can develop and excel in yours. If it's difficult to name two or three things you have some ability in or just plain love to do, think about things others do that you would like to do too and take some lessons or join an enthusiasts club. When you're following your passion, not only will it have a therapeutic effect, but you'll feel unique and accomplished, all of which can help build your self confidence. Plus, adding a variety of interests to your life will not only make you more confident, but it will increase your chances of meeting compatible friends!

Be thankful for what you have. A lot of the times, at the root of insecurity and lack of confidence is a feeling of not having enough of something, whether it's emotional validation, good luck, money, etc. By acknowledging and appreciating what you do have, you can combat the feeling of being incomplete and unsatisfied. Finding that inner peace will do wonders for your confidence.

Be Positive, even if you don't feel the same way. Avoid self-pity, or the pity and sympathy of others. Never allow others to make you feel inferior--they can only do so if you let them. If you continue to loathe and belittle yourself, others are going to do and believe likewise. Instead, speak positively about yourself, about your future, and about your progress. Do not be afraid to project your strengths and qualities to others. By doing so, you reinforce those ideas in your mind and encourage your growth in a positive direction.

Accept compliments gracefully. Don't roll your eyes and say, "Yeah, right," or shrug it off. Take it to heart and respond positively ("Thank you" and a smile works well).

Look in the mirror and smile. Studies surrounding what's called the "facial feedback theory" suggest that the expressions on your face can actually encourage your brain to register certain emotions. So by looking in the mirror and smiling every day, you might feel happier with yourself and more confident in the long run.

Fake it. Along the same lines of smiling to make yourself feel happy, acting confident might actually make you believe it. Pretend you're a completely confident version of you; go through the motions and see how you feel!

Stick to your principles. It might be tough, but if you don't have something you can believe in, you don't have anything. If you don't stand for something, you will fall for anything. No matter what's happened in your life, you can always lay claim to the fact that from this day forward, you've followed your principles to the best of your ability.

Help others. When you know you're kind to the people around you, and are making a positive difference in other people's lives (even if it's just being kinder to the person who serves you coffee in the morning), you'll know that you are a positive force in the world--which will boost your self confidence.

Avoid perfectionism: Perfectionism paralyzes you and keeps you from accomplishing your goals.

Career Advice / Emotional Stress Symptoms
« on: June 19, 2013, 08:26:16 PM »
Anger is an emotional state that can range in its intensity from irritation to intense fury and uncontrollable rage. During anger our heart rate and blood pressure increase as well as affecting levels of adrenaline and noradrenaline.

Aggression is characterized by hostile or destructive behavior or actions, aggressive behavior leads to self-assertion, and normally arises when expectations are blocked, threatened or removed and may arise as a response to frustration. Aggression may manifest as destructive and attacking behavior, hostility or by self-expressive drive to control.

Panic is a sudden strong feeling of fear that prevents reasonable thought or action and impairs behaviour. Panic attacks are triggered by either an internal or external stimuli. Internal stimuli can include physical sensations such as fast heartbeats, thoughts, memories or emotional that has association with fear or panic. External stimuli can include sudden temperature or light intensity changes, loud noises, fast moving objects, smells and even strange taste in the mouth.

Moods are a pervasive and sustained emotion that can alter the perception of the world, impacting on behavior, relationships and self-image. Moods can range from ecstasy to deep depression, also include sadness, feeling lonely, elation, anger, irritability or joy. Other negative moods include Aggravated, Alone, bemused, angry, annoyed, anxious, apathetic, ashamed, bewildered, bitchy, bored, cold, complacent, cynical dark, depressed, disappointed, discontent, envious, exhausted, frustrated, gloomy, grumpy, guilty, irritated, jealous, lazy, lethargic, melancholic, pessimistic, shocked, sick, unsympathetic, tired, uncomfortable and just feeling weird.

Irritable is normally characterized as being prone to excessive anger, annoyance or impatience. In addition to being abnormally sensitive to stimuli.

Depression is characterized by ones inability to focus, concentrate, feelings on sadness, guilt, hopelessness, helplessness or death, and loss of appetite and inability to sleep.

Worry is characterized by uncontrollable recurrent or obsessive thoughts, inability to concentrate, with fear inducing thoughts, confusion, and feelings of doom. Worry can also be accompanied with physical symptoms, dizziness, dry mouth, erratic heart-rate or high blood pressure etc.

Losing Control
Losing control is characterized by overwhelming feelings that one may feel that you will do something that would be embarrassing, or passing out, vomit, gag or stumble etc. In addition to feelings of not being able to control what may be said or control the body, one also may become highly self-conscious among others. While it is very unlikely one would lose control, the fear of losing control is very real and disabilitating.

Abrasive or being aggressive is characterized by being in a state of impatience, hostile to stimuli especially people.

Hostile Mental State
A hostile mental state means being deliberately unfriendly, displaying animosity, normally accompanied by feeling of anger and thoughts which can be violent in nature.

Feeling nervous is characterized by feelings and behavior of anxiety, tension: Feeling edgy, fidgety, jumpy, jittery, tense, restless, unsettled and restless.

Emotional/Tearful is characterized by an underlying feelings that occasionally surface as crying, deep sadness, heightened sensitivity, feelings distressed, paranoid or “hurt” in the company of people, or through re-living or replaying thoughts or conversations repeatedly.

Feeling fearful is characterized by the irrational state of fear without any visible or obvious cause. This may manifest itself as anticipation of “doom” or “dread”, fear of illnesses, death of oneself or other.

Feeling guilty is characterized by experiencing feelings of guilt at being stressed, worrying, or feeling down or worthless.

Feeling paranoid is characterized by a mental and emotional states which create a mindset in which the individual feels that the world is “out to get them”, suspicious of people talking behind one’s back, Paranoia causes intense feelings of distrust, and can lead to hostile behavior.

Career Advice / Personal Code of Ethics
« on: June 19, 2013, 08:12:52 PM »
This code of ethics is one that I feel is important in life, both personally and professionally.

Personal Code of Ethics

To be honest- the more honest you are, the more trustworthy you become.
Have integrity- the better of a person you are, the better an image you present.
Be responsible- you must be responsible in life so that others can rely on you.
Tell the truth- the value of truth is immeasurable, because without it, the world would just be filled with lies.
Give credit where credit is due- without crediting people for their ideas/works, it is considered stealing and we are cheating them of their hard work.
Be courteous- every act of kindness makes a difference in the life of someone.
Have respect- one of the most important things is to treat other as you wish to be treated.
Trust- trust is the building block of relationships we create in our lives.
Be harmonious- to live together and get along with everyone is a “delicacy” that we all long for.
Don’t change who you are to please others- it’s not worth becoming a completely different person simply to make other people happy because by doing so, you may be making yourself unhappy.

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