English Class Room Jokes

[Shampa Iftakhar]

1.
TEACHER : Fred, your ideas are like diamonds.
FRED: You mean they're so valuable?
TEACHER: No, I mean they're so rare.

[Shampa Iftakhar]

2.
TEACHER: Fred, the story you handed in called "Our Dog," is exactly like your brother's.
FRED: Of course. It's the same dog.

[Shampa Iftakhar]

3.
TEACHER: Your poem is the worst in the class. It's not only ungrammatical, it's rude and in bad taste. I'm going to send your father a note about it.
PUPIL: I don't think that would help, teacher. He wrote it.

[Shampa Iftakhar]

4.
TEACHER: What are you writing?
PUPIL: A letter to myself.
TEACHER: What does it say?
PUPIL: I don't know. I won't get it till tomorrow.

[Shampa Iftakhar]

5.
TEACHER: Where is your pencil, Harmon?
PUPIL: I ain't got none.
TEACHER: How many times have I told you not to say that, Harmon? Now listen: I do not have a pencil. You do not have a pencil. They do not have a pencil. Now, do you understand?
PUPIL: Not really. What happened to all the pencils?

[Shampa Iftakhar]

TEACHER: Use "defeat," "defense" and "detail" in a sentence.
PUPIL: The rabbit cut across the field, and defeat went over defense before detail.

[Shampa Iftakhar]

TEACHER: How many letters are there in the alphabet?
PUPIL: Eleven.
TEACHER: Eleven!
PUPIL: T H E A L P H A B E T = 11 !

[Shampa Iftakhar]

TEACHER: Herman, name two pronouns.
PUPIL: Who, me?
TEACHER: Correct!

[Antara11]

Really funny.... ;D

[Shampa Iftakhar]

Thank you, Antara mam.

[Tahsina]

Teacher: What's in H2O?
Student: H I J K L M N O  :P

[A.S. Rafi]

Hilarious!!  ;D